Julie Gumm - Author

Three Precious Gifts – Guest Post by Michelle Benner

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During National Adoption Month you’ll get to hear from some amazing people. Today’s guest post is from Michelle Benner, a pastor’s wife and adoptive mom.

When my husband, Phil and I got married, we had already decided that we would probably adopt and have biological children if we could.  But for some reason, I had this feeling in the back of my mind that we would probably not be able to get pregnant.

We intentionally waited awhile (6 years) before trying to start a family, and after about a year we had some basic infertility tests done and everything came back fine…I honestly was not that surprised, or even necessarily upset, although it would have been nice to have an “answer”.   So we took it as our cue to start looking into adoption and decided to go throughBethany Christian Services for a domestic adoption.

Our case worker told us we should find a placement within 6-12 months, possibly less.  As it turned out, the agency had just placed a lot of babies and just didn’t have many birth moms coming in for counseling.  So we waited.  And waited.  And waited some more.  It was tough – I was nannying part time for some friends from church, but I really just wanted to be home with a baby of my own.  My biological clock was definitely ticking – by this time we had been married over 8 years and I was 33 years old.  And of course it felt like all my friends were having babies….sigh.

Almost exactly six months after our home study was completed I got an email from a friend in MI who I hadn’t seen or heard from in a couple years (we lived in Chicago).  She said she wanted me to call her…..kinda weird, but right away I just knew it had to be about a baby.  I called her and sure enough, a couple she went to church with was taking care of their 7 mos. old granddaughter and trying to convince their daughter (the birth mom) to let the baby be adopted.
My friend knew we were in the process of adopting but didn’t know what was going on.  I told her we were approved and waiting and that we would be interested in this little girl.  So my friend gave the grandma my phone number and she called me – the ONLY reason she even agreed to talk to me is because we were already approved through Bethany and that is who she was planning to do the adoption with!
Just a week or so later we were going to be driving back to PA to visit our families for Christmas so we took a little detour to Lansing and met the grandparents and baby.  It was kinda crazy because at this point the agency was not involved, we were just meeting on our own at their house and had no idea what each other was thinking….but we were pretty captivated by this adorable little girl.  It was kind of hard going through the holidays not knowing if she was going to become our daughter, yet I did sort of have a peace and confidence that she was going to be joining our family.
Thankfully, through only God’s ways of making things happen, we were then able to bring our Arianna home the beginning of February!  She has been such a blessing, and little did we know that just 9 months later we would be bringing home her full biological baby brother, Nathaniel.  He was 7 months old – they are only 11 months apart – and we knew their birth mom was pregnant with him from the beginning but we had no idea what might happen.  We’re so glad that God did!  Nate is an awesome little guy and we’re so blessed by him.
But, our story doesn’t end there….last Spring (2011), 2 weeks after Nate turned 2 and before Ari turned 3, we found out a baby sister was born.  Whoa, what??  We had no idea this time that their birth mom was even pregnant.  We were not feeling ready to add to the family again.   But things were got held up in the legal system and after about 7 mos. we felt like we could not say no….we had to give this baby the chance to grow up with her siblings.  So we agreed to take her and hoped we might bring her home a couple months later, around the beginning of the year.  But because of legal stuff (ugh!!) we just brought her home in September, when she was 16 months old.  Her name is Alethea (greek for “truth”), we call her Lea.  She is adorable and her big brother and sister love her.
We cannot believe how blessed we are, to have been given these three precious gifts.  When I look back on it, I know our story is kinda crazy….but I’m so thankful it is our story and I would not trade it for anything.  People sometimes say that our kids are so lucky to have us but they definitely have it backwards!  Parenting is definitely a challenge but for sure the biggest blessing I have ever been given.
Phil & Michelle Benner live in Wellsboro, PA.  Phil is an Assistant Pastor at their church and Michelle is a stay at home mom, is involved with the local MOPS group, and when she has a few minutes of free time enjoys reading, knitting and sleeping.  🙂

Comments

  1. Hi! I was wondering if you’d follow/subscribe my new blog: http://www.katherineconcannon.blogspot.com
    It’s about my family and my life as a mother to 8, six adopted children and 2 biological children. I don’t have any followers yet so i’d appreciate it if you’d follow it and/or pass it along to others. Thanks!