Since November is National Adoption Month I’m writing a daily series on “30 Things I Know About Adoption.”
Yesterday we talked about the people that think you’re crazy when you announce you’re going to adopt.
In the beginning you meet those reactions with all smiles and hope and happiness.
But at some point in the adoption process you stop and realize, “HOLY CRAP, I think they were right!!!”
The doubt will creep in.
What are we doing?
Our life is totally going to change!
This is costing us a fortune.
What if the kid hates us?
What if our bio kids hate us for doing this?
How am I going to manage four kids when some days I can barely manage two?
That last one was the one that got to me. Over and over. Every time we had a rough parenting day (and there are quite a few), I’d wonder what on earth possessed me to think I could effectively parent four kids. And help two of them navigate all of the issues inherent with adoption and grief.
But I finally realized a few things:
- Every parent wonders if they’re doing a good enough job whether they have adopted kids or not. Parenting is the toughest thing you’ll ever do, and definitely the hardest.
- Satan was having a heyday with my doubts and insecurities. Wouldn’t he love to convince us that we can’t handle adoption. Wouldn’t he love to see more children without the love and security of a family – easy prey for him.
- I can’t do it. At least not alone. Maybe I needed to be reminded of that. That I am not in this alone. Not only do I have an amazing parenting partner in my husband. But I have Christ. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
Are you crazy?
Quite possibly yes.
But God asks his followers to do some CRAZY things! Build a giant ark, sacrifice a son, part the Red Sea… I mean, really, how crazy does adoption sound after that???
After yesterday’s post, my friend Tracie Loux shared the post on Facebook and added, “I collect crazy people!!”
At least we’re all in the crazy boat together, right 🙂
You totally got this.
And God’s got you!!
Thank you so much !
When my husband and I are finished with Bible College, we will begin the process of adoption. Our family, friends, and classmates think we are crazy. Your posts have been very eye opening. Thank you so much.
That is awesome. I love to see couples planning ahead 🙂
This is a great post. After one bio and one adoption and swearing I have all I can handle, I still find myself trolling the adoption sites on our “good” days. Then someone gets sick or work gets hectic or the money runs out and I wonder what I was thinking. Thankfully i have a supportive husband who will happily take the ride with me no matter which road we choose. I’m happy to read your post and know that I’m not the only one with doubts!